Friday, July 26, 2013

Good Morning Sunshine

I awoke this morning to the sound of birds chirping happy songs and the beginning streams of the early dawn sun peeking through my open windows.  I luxuriated in bed, allowing myself a few moments of quiet reflection.  I smiled, feeling in my heart today was going to be a good day.

As I went through my usual morning reading, meditation and yoga practice, I quieted my mind and reflected upon the last week.  It had been a very emotional, stressful week.  It culminated with tears last evening.  It's true what they say, there is nothing like a good cry.  I released the tension in that cry.  Let go.  This morning as I moved and stretched my body, I felt completely refreshed.  Happy.  Hopeful.

Leading up to my good, solid cry was a week during which I felt as if I was in a rut.  Professionally and personally. I was beginning to doubt myself as a writer, athlete and person. I had been on an emotional roller coaster and was out of sorts. I had lashed out at people who are important to me, yet I didn't really know why.  I could say it was out of fear, and it likely was, however I'm tired of accepting fear.  It's held me in it's chains for too long.  It seemed as if I was in the same place in life I had been for quite a long time.  Stuck in that proverbial rut.  And it was as if I had become comfortable there, complacent in my fear of climbing out of it.  There is comfort in routine, even detrimental routine.  It would take strength to climb out of it, and it would be hard.  The tears came, and became the release that would turn into becoming the push I needed.

Then, late last evening came a conversation with a colleague whom I greatly respect.  A fellow writer, who had sent me a message acknowledging a recent piece I had published.  He said "Thank You", and advised he had shared my work on several media outlets.

The expression "I'm right where I need to be at this moment" came to my mind.  Something clicked inside of me and a feeling of lightness came over me. It was a small thing to him, but it meant a great deal to me.  Inspiration surrounds me,  I just wasn't seeing it.  I wasn't willing.  I had unwittingly closed myself off to the opportunity for creativity and happiness.

There have been some wonderful things that have come into my life. Instead of focusing on the wonderful, amazing blessings, I had remained closed.  Choosing worry and doubt over happiness and freedom.  I was languishing in their shackles.  No more.  Last night I let go.

I had been writing, but I hadn't really been writing from my soul.  I had been existing, but I had not been living to my full potential.

During my brief conversation with my colleague, I expressed that I had been in that rut and that his sharing of my work had given me a boost, for which I thanked him.  He said "It's not a rut, it's how life works. It's recharging your creative energy for writing.  Just like everything in life, things need time to grow."  I found this to be so moving.  Not only had I been recharging creative energy for writing, but also for living.

Sometimes it takes nearly losing something precious to open our eyes, hearts and minds.  To allow sunshine back into our lives.

Today, I am feeling inspired, open and loving.  Finally.  The same birds are still chirping happily as the full, beautiful sunshine touches my shoulders.  Freedom.



  1. Sometimes all you need is a good cry to allow all that tension to be released. I'm so glad that you're getting through it Michelle and it was a very nice gesture for your colleague to share you work. This also shows how good your writing is, so even if you feel a little low at times, you still are inspiring others.
    Have a great weekend, and I hope those birds give you a song every morning.

  2. Isn't it amazing what a slight change in perspective can do for you? Glad you're feeling better, Michelle.

  3. Michelle ((hugs)) to you.. Crying always helps.. Not crying leaves you heavy.its burden.. take care.

  4. I also nominated you for Versatile Blogger Award and I would love if you accept it :) You can get all the details in this post :)

  5. Michelle, sometimes I get in those proverbial ruts too. The conversation you had with a fellow writer reaffirmed exactly what you needed to hear. So great when that happens! In fact, his words are what many of us need to hear and love what he said about how you’re not in a rut, you’re recharging your creative energy for writing. That is a ray of sunshine! Hugs to you!

  6. I sware I'm walking in your shoes but in Los wrote what I've been feeling; I'm the male version. I've been going through some ups and downs lately as well but I believe life has a rhythm, we all have our own beat. I think in life, we wake up and the beat changes and we don't realize we're still dancing on the same beat. So off rhythm means nothing goes right; then one day you catch the beat and BOOM! everything goes right again....I posted something similar and rumpunch